19 Feb 10 What’s the #BUZZ about Google Buzz? Oh look, the Emperor has got no clothes on
You have come across Google Buzz or maybe you haven’t. Anyway it is Google’s answer to Twitter, Facebook and other social media platforms, although, I wonder what the question was if Buzz is the answer.
It launched recently to a bit of a viral fanfare and all of us social media maniacs and Twitter pimps toddled on over to check it out. It seems that lots of people are going absolutely unnecessary about it. It will apparently kill off Twitter, Facebook and change the world as we know it. I say ‘apparently’ for a reason.
The problem is that I am still trying to work how Buzz accommodates any need I have. I keep coming back looking at it and thinking, ‘I must be missing something’.
I understand Blogs, LinkedIn, FaceBook and Twitter and they have somehow seamlessly slotted into the way I do things personally and professionally. I can write once on any of them and publish everywhere. I can use things like TweetDeck to get multiple views of Twitter based on friends, interest topics or back-chat. Others use aggregators like FriendFeed or Posterous but they all do variations on a theme – they collect all this etherlution (© Dave Yates, meaning rubbish deposited all over the web) and collates in into a single, manageable distribution and collection point for all you want to cherry pick from these platforms.
So while I detest e.g. FB, I do understand why it is there and I can interact with my contacts on it without having to go on it very often. Similarly with LinkedIn. I quite like it, but I don’t feel compelled to ‘live’ on it. I use it from time to time, but can update it remotely with a range of tools, mainly my Blog and Twitter account.
But again today, I returned to Buzz, looking at it this way and that and concluding that I must be missing something, because lots of people are saying it is great and everything else will now become obsolete. I repeat, I really must be missing something because, for the life of me, I don’t get it, I don’t know what to do with it and I don’t know why everyone else is raving about it.
Oh Look – the emperor’s just gone by without any clothes on.
10 Feb 10 Dictionary of Online Abbreviations
Image shamelessly adapted from toothpastefordinner.com
I know there are pre-existing glossaries out there, but at least with this one I know where it is for reference. Also I can keep adding to it.
Please feel free to suggest any more via the comments box and I will add them to the list
- AFK – away from keyboard (I am gone for a few minutes)
- AFAIK – as far as I know
- ASL – age / sex / location?
- BFF – best friends, forever
- BFN – bye for now
- BIO – going for bio break (washroom break)
- BRB – be right back
- BTW – by the way
- CSAK – Chucking Silently At Keyboard
- CUL8R – see you later
- CYA – see ya (or it could also be: cover your a*s)
- DH – darling husband
- DD – darling daughter
- DS – darling son
- FMV – fair market value (for selling items online)
- FTW – for the win (basically a big thumbs up)
- GG – good game
- IBTL – in before the lock (for when you post a message prior to the administrator locking the heated discussion thread)
- IMHO – in my humble opinion
- IMNSHO – in my not so humble opinion
- IRL – in real life
- KK – OK (commonly used by online gamers to acknowledge that a message has been received)
- LOL – laughing out loud
- MT – mispell (commonly used by online gamers to say that they made a mistake and mistyped their last message)
- NP – no problem/you’re welcome
- NWOT – new without tags (for selling items online)
- NWT – new with tags (for selling items online)
- BNWT – brand new with tags (for selling items online)
- OOAK – one of a kind (for selling items online)
- PICNIC – problem in chair not in computer (apparently favoured by IT support techs when dealing with low ability users)
- PLZ – please
- PLIBT – please let it be true
- PMSL – P*ssing myself laughing (a common UK expression)
- POS – Parents [watching] Over Shoulder
- QFT – quoted for truth (a compliment to another person on the forum)
- RL – real life
- ROFL – rolling on floor laughing
- ROFLMAO – rolling on floor laughing my a*s off
- RTFM – read the f***ing manual (to show frustration at someone’s ignorance of basic knowledge)
- RTM – read the manual
- SCAOMM – Spat Coffee All Over My Monitor (when something is very amusing)
- TBH – to be honest
- THX – thanks
- TTFN – ta-ta for now
- TTYL – talk to you later
- TX – thanks
- TY – thank you
- VFF – very f***ing funny
- W/E – whatever
- WTF – what the f*** [is that all about]
08 Feb 10 iPhone …or perhaps I don’t any more
iPhone Apps - Want them more than need them?
I found myself not using the iPhone recently while doing a load of Mountain Biking. I put it away safe in a drawer while doing rufty tufty phone threatening activities. Instead, I dragged one of the collection of old phones out of a drawerr, I got a free Orange PAYG card, filled it up with £20 and it has lasted months. I stick it in my pocket and use it if I get lost, when I fall off and need someone to put me or my bike back together.
But it has had a sobering effect. I have started asking myself what the hell I need an iPhone for at all. It’s a shame as well. I have an App called Map My Ride which is great for Mountain Biking. But I don’t use it because it s not so good if you smash your phone while taking a tumble. To give you an idea, I fall off at least once every time I go out on my MTB and usually a lot more. I started thinking that if I were to break, lose, or get my iPhone stolen etc. then I would suffer a load of cost and the sickening feeling you get when you break something nice. If I break the old Nokia, I rip out the sim card, bin the bits and get another cheapie out of the drawer, or on Ebay
iPhone meets mountain biking - not a good combo
Mountain Biking is good for the soul in many respects. All that exercise and fresh air combine with the pain and repeated falling off and landing on your head. It knocks some sense into you. With regard to the iPhone, my MTB epiphany on the off road trail to my metaphoric Damascus led me to suspect that I want it more than need it (note to self: Design iPhone App based on lyrics, such as Glenn Campbell’s ‘Wichita Lineman’). I make myself use apps because they are there and handy, but in some respects they add extra chores to my day rather than save time. I like the idea of iXpenseIt, but it takes loads of time to use and the pics of the receipts are rubbish because the iPhone camera is poor indoors and poor at close-up – exactly the setting where you take pics of the receipts. I actually create more work for myself!
Then I have to wonder again. My old friend Ravi Damani and his cousin Chetan over at Imano are developing brilliant augmented reality apps. But do I really want to augment reality – I might find that I am superfluous rather than my phone. I could then send my iPhone to work and sooner or later it would realise that as much fun as I was, I was just expensive, stupid and unnecessary. It would dispose of me!
Meanwhile, back in the real world, I think everyone should try putting their iPhone / Blackberry away for a week and instead go back to a basic handset. You’ll be surprised at how superfluous a lot of its functions are. Funnily enough, I got used to using a phone based camera when I got an iPhone. But the iPhone camera is not particularly good. I wonder whether I should get a decent pocket camera and a basic phone instead of paying £30 / month for the pleasure of keeping a beautiful design icon in my pocket.
04 Feb 10 Apple iPad – Guess the review – What can we learn from history?
Apparently Apple has launched its iPad – news has even made it to Worcestershire! Apple fans love it. Geeks hate it. Why is that so predictable? Or is it? I’m just predicting that’s what the response will be. I haven’t read a single review yet, so before I do, based entirely on twenty years of Mac use, here is what I think the conclusion will be:
If history is anything to go by, the iPad will be innovative in its own way – but not by some other people’s definition of innovative. It will probably disappoint the techno-purists because it will use whatever edge it has to satisfy some kind of mass market potential (and critically it won’t be Microsoft or Linux). And the same techno purists will be quick to point out that some gizmo or other does some or all of it’s functions better and uses some or other connectivity or processor or screen that ‘rocks’ (said in the way only geeks can pronounce it) while the iPad ‘sucks man’ (again said in John Major meets Michael Moore geek accent). It will extend the Apple ethos of the Digital Hub making it a natural add-on to the rest of the i-suite of things out there, which will again anger someone for some reason.
Basically, it will infuriate the anti Apple brigade simply because it will be made by Apple. That has always been enough to bring out IT geeks the world over to burn effigies of Steve Jobs.
Steve Wozniac, co-founder of Apple back in the day and ‘not bitter at all’ exile these days, will appear in some Tech mag and tell us how he came up with the idea in the first place, back in the 1980′s and it would be much better if it employed some unpronounceable concept that only he understands.
Over time, the release version will prove to be underpowered and comparatively slow, lacking in memory and it will be unstable until about version 1.3. This is because everything Apple make is a great idea but a bad execution in it’s launch version. It then burns out quickly or the screens break or some such disaster befalls the early adopters. The second version is more robust, but the software is flakey or the connectivity is poor. You don’t really get a polished version out until third time around – which will be good. However, for all it’s early problems, it will capture people’s imagination better than any of its rivals have and it will redefine the market place for these devices.
Several niche companies and several large companies will file patent infringement cases on its technology, interface or other aspects of it. These will variously go on for years and no one will remember what they were all about when they eventually get settled.
It will be plaigiarised – or perhaps I should say it will inspire Microsoft and others like Nokia, Dell, and a load of firms from China – who will claim they were working on their version of it all along. These will get launched about a year later and spontaneously look remarkably like Apple’s product. They will be called ‘ePads’, ‘xPads’ and ‘MyPads’. Everyone will then get sued by Always Ultra who whose own iPad product will do something completely different. All the Windows based clones will be really fiddly, stuffed full of lots of features and complicated interfaces. They will impress the editors of computer mags but inadvertently reinforce the Apple iPad (or whatever it gets called) as a people’s favourite.
A final word or warning: You will need to watch out for slightly insecure and over-paid people conspicuously taking their Apple iPad to the pub and making sure everyone can see they have one.
25 Jan 09 Dave Yates and Macs – A history in The Guardian
As reported under my user name of Pyrus in The Guardian
Apple Mac LCII c. 1992
In 1992 I bought a Mac LCII with an earth shattering 4Mb of RAM and a 40Mb hard drive. I was to be liberated to create graphics faster, better and right on the bleeding edge.
Formerly I had sketched with pencils, I had embellished with Magic Markers, I had crafted prototypes, meticulously created key lines with scalpel cut tramlines and fine point draughsman pens. I had stripped film and acetate in and out of things. I had done this patiently through amendment after amendment and 1992 was the year it was all going to change.
Armed with a creative brief and a fortnight to deliver I scoffed at the nay-sayers who predicted the death of ‘real’ design, plugged the LCII in and switched it on.
I loaded PhotoShop, and Quark. I opened up the software. It froze and crashed. Launch – crash – launch – crash. I phoned the shop they talked about RAM and other things. I said “I see” but what I meant was “uh???”. They told me to “Zap the P-RAM”. Realising, by now that I was technically brain-dead, they explained that this was the equivalent of “giving the machine a good kick in the bollocks”. With fingers contorted onto the Command, Option, P and R keys all at the same time, I got my girlfriend to press the ‘On’ button. Three sets of start-up chimes and back came the desktop, apparently chastened by the having it testiculars zapped.
I launched PhotoShop – Crash – launch – crash -launch – crash.
After a week of this and lots of phone calls, I told the bloke from the shop to come and sort it out. He turned up and regailed me with stories of virtual memory allowing me to get 8Mb of RAM out of it and then sold me RAM Doubler – giving me 16Mb of RAM out of the thing.
A new week started. I launched PhotoShop. Yippee. It opened. I started to create things – I played with the stunning array of twelve fonts and marveled at how easily I could switch from one to another. I spent all day putting the basics into the my project, with each key-stroke I became more skilled and even had a couple of Eureka moments.
Then at about 10pm, it crashed and I lost all of it. I zapped it’s P-RAM repeatedly, metaphorically hoofing its nads with relish. The rest of the week went on in a similar fashion. I developed a nervous twitch where my left thumb and middle finger would simulaneously press the Command and the S buttons every two or three minutes. Even this would cause it to crash at times and the data would disappear. I would shout at it “Nooo! DON’T PLEASE…. I’ll zap your PRAM if you dare… Oh you Bastard”.
By Friday afternoon of week two, I had learned zap the P-RAM nonchalently by putting the stapler on the Command and Option keys while holding the P and R keys with one hand and drinking coffee with the other. I wanted the machine to think I didn’t really care and it was pointless trying to piss me off.
I also had to revert to the Magic Markers with less than two hours to deliver the visuals. Ironically I was congratulated on the more edgey style of graphics.
I stuck with MAC and I’m glad I did. But it was in 1992 that I started using the phrase ‘Zap it’ for any technical thing that went wrong. Apple’s legacy to me from that era is this phrase, now hard coded into my vocabulary. My love for Macs happened much later. Certainly at that time I hated the bloody thing with a passion.
